Thursday, May 7, 2009 @ 5/07/2009 02:56:00 PM
This is the only place where I can express my feelings very clearly without using any vocals..
Talking about the way I want things to be might be really demanding from other people's perspective. I am trying my very best to change myself and well I have also started on my revisions with my girlfriend and I feel that when I am with her, I always can have this temporaily strength to push myself forward but I do not know when it will be permanent.
Being a somewhat leader in my clique or brothers is definitely as tough as ever. They have stopped respecting me, they do not need advise from me no more, they are independent now.. They do things which might not include me just because I had a girlfriend. No matter how hard i tired to tell my brothers, they just won't sit down and listen to me patiently.. I had this problem once but was able to settle it promptly but.. now its different. The rising tension in school had been a real big problem and I always listen to my girlfriend to ignore them but.. they are moreover my friends.. hais sometimes things don't go your way as what you wished. Talking about relationship, I feel that my girlfriend is a very very BIG motivation towards everything that I do. I do not feel stress with my girlfriend but... sometimes being not able to know about her is one thing I hated myself. Not being able to coax her is something which makes me hate myself even more. I wanna understand her more.. because I am afraid, just scared. Being able to spend quality time with her is one thing I always wished for. Hope everything will pass smoothly, I can take no pain anymore. Problems at home gradually gets better, communications between each other have thus been improved. This is something I really want. Oh ya, today darlingg was stress while she was doing her maths paper 2, just wanna say this. Don't worry baby ! everything is gonna be fine ! JIAYOUS for UPCOMING PAPERS !



When will be the time I will be confident?
Darling, I am crazy over you ... Don't keep me hanging there.

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